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LUTFI
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HAZMI.
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IFAHSYG.
LINSYG.
ISABELSYG.
FATINSYG.
MARDSYG.
AMIRSYG.
NATSYG.
SHEKYNROCKSYG.
YAYUSYG.
LUTFI
JOVISSYG.
HAZMI.
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Saturday, February 26, 2011
Sometimes, there is so much we feel but so little we can say.
Finally convinced dad to repair the sewing machine at home. I wanna do alterations and all that soon2 since I'm going to have the timeeeee :D
And he's asking me to make use of the oven at home and start baking. Heh. I ask him to buy everything but I need the time you see. Its not that I'm lazy. haha. I think.
Blissful Saturday spent at home because of throat and fever and headache and flu. I guess Celest is going to screw me on Monday for missing Irene's party. haha. Still, sleeping was gooooooood. But now, I feel like having Hershey's Sundae pie from BK. I think I also just want to go out, catch a movie or just eat. Eat Hershey's Sundae pie also. I want to feel worry-free, like I know I don't have much to do when I get home after I've spent the whole day outside. You know?
I also miss the 3 of them. And some of the rest. Guess we'll be seeing each other soon enough. :D
Let's go swimming as well.
Toodles.
And he's asking me to make use of the oven at home and start baking. Heh. I ask him to buy everything but I need the time you see. Its not that I'm lazy. haha. I think.
Blissful Saturday spent at home because of throat and fever and headache and flu. I guess Celest is going to screw me on Monday for missing Irene's party. haha. Still, sleeping was gooooooood. But now, I feel like having Hershey's Sundae pie from BK. I think I also just want to go out, catch a movie or just eat. Eat Hershey's Sundae pie also. I want to feel worry-free, like I know I don't have much to do when I get home after I've spent the whole day outside. You know?
I also miss the 3 of them. And some of the rest. Guess we'll be seeing each other soon enough. :D
Let's go swimming as well.
Toodles.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
There's about to be a BitchFit.
Last I remember, it was the 4th of February.
And now, 23rd, its here again. Same month.
Bitchfits. Mood swings. Pain. Smoking. Pain. Sleep.
Baah.
And I think I'm going to vent it on you,just not yet. I'm just being very particular about everything you do or say. Maybe because I know that you know and I know you'd understand. I'm so mean.
Almost fought with a fellow teacher earlier. Maybe its my period, or maybe Durga's 'stand up for your rights' , 'fight for your say' and spontaneous attitude has rubbed off me a lil. Too bad I couldn't get a word in because it will seem as if we're ganging up on her.
Ass.Why become an early childhood educator when you don't have the heart?
Working and schooling life is totally different. I cannot stand people who come up to me comparing and asking me this and that. Yes, I know my centre is within my area. I know its at most probably 40 minutes away. I know that. But my whole nine hours there isn't just sitting around, sleeping, listening to my teacher talk or taking down notes. Its moving around,establishing human contact, packing, cleaning, paperwork, artwork. I don't have to tell whatever I do there. I don't see the need to tell everyone what I do everyday and expect people to symphatise with me. I can accept the fact that this is just the way it goes. At the end of the day, I feel tired, I don't go around complaining about this and that, expecting them to listen and make everyone around me think like I'm the only one who has a freaking job in the house. I mind my own business and rest. I get up and do what is expected of me. I don't use work as an excuse to neglect anything or whatsoever. So I wonder what freaking rights you think you have to compare us. You and me, we're totally living differently. Don't give us the bullshit about school being far and how tiring it is. I've been living that way and its only changed temporarily now. You had your chance, you screwed up. Where you are now, whatever long way you have to take now is all because of your own stupidity and immaturity in the past. Your self centered attitude and how you think everyone always has it easier than you ever will. You had it the easy way, everyone was happy, but you went and screwed up. You think you're being mature about it by correcting your mistakes now and saying you accept whatever that has happened. But maturity isn't about just saying "I've grown mature over the years". Its about the mind, its the way you think. You don't just say you're matured now and can think responsibly for the sake of saying it because it sounds pleasing to the ears. You don't assume you're matured and people should trust you just because your age has increased. Its all in the mind. Its in the way you think and its when you stop thinking the world revolves around you. It revolves around the Sun,right? Seriously.
When that day comes... insyallah.
Morning~
And now, 23rd, its here again. Same month.
Bitchfits. Mood swings. Pain. Smoking. Pain. Sleep.
Baah.
And I think I'm going to vent it on you,just not yet. I'm just being very particular about everything you do or say. Maybe because I know that you know and I know you'd understand. I'm so mean.
Almost fought with a fellow teacher earlier. Maybe its my period, or maybe Durga's 'stand up for your rights' , 'fight for your say' and spontaneous attitude has rubbed off me a lil. Too bad I couldn't get a word in because it will seem as if we're ganging up on her.
Ass.Why become an early childhood educator when you don't have the heart?
Working and schooling life is totally different. I cannot stand people who come up to me comparing and asking me this and that. Yes, I know my centre is within my area. I know its at most probably 40 minutes away. I know that. But my whole nine hours there isn't just sitting around, sleeping, listening to my teacher talk or taking down notes. Its moving around,establishing human contact, packing, cleaning, paperwork, artwork. I don't have to tell whatever I do there. I don't see the need to tell everyone what I do everyday and expect people to symphatise with me. I can accept the fact that this is just the way it goes. At the end of the day, I feel tired, I don't go around complaining about this and that, expecting them to listen and make everyone around me think like I'm the only one who has a freaking job in the house. I mind my own business and rest. I get up and do what is expected of me. I don't use work as an excuse to neglect anything or whatsoever. So I wonder what freaking rights you think you have to compare us. You and me, we're totally living differently. Don't give us the bullshit about school being far and how tiring it is. I've been living that way and its only changed temporarily now. You had your chance, you screwed up. Where you are now, whatever long way you have to take now is all because of your own stupidity and immaturity in the past. Your self centered attitude and how you think everyone always has it easier than you ever will. You had it the easy way, everyone was happy, but you went and screwed up. You think you're being mature about it by correcting your mistakes now and saying you accept whatever that has happened. But maturity isn't about just saying "I've grown mature over the years". Its about the mind, its the way you think. You don't just say you're matured now and can think responsibly for the sake of saying it because it sounds pleasing to the ears. You don't assume you're matured and people should trust you just because your age has increased. Its all in the mind. Its in the way you think and its when you stop thinking the world revolves around you. It revolves around the Sun,right? Seriously.
When that day comes... insyallah.
Morning~
Friday, February 18, 2011
No expectations means no disappointments :)
I was telling her yesterday, how weird everything is.
I just woke up one morning on the way to work and let all my expectations go.
I didn't want to think about why. I didn't want to think about what. I didn't want to expect anything. And I feel so much lighter.
So, thanks for taking the effort again.
And I'm thankful for you. Always being there. Some things happen for a reason. I'm not going to listen or let what anyone say influence whatever impression I have on you. :)
Now,I don't know what I wanna talk about but I wanna talk to you. Baah.
Cutting and pasting resources. I'm not in the mood for 3rd assessment. I don't wish to feel demoralised. I guess that's the reason why I'm doing last minute prep works.
Oh well~
After Monday, I'm gonna party everyday after work.
Ok, probably not everyday. :D
No goodnights, just mornings!
I just woke up one morning on the way to work and let all my expectations go.
I didn't want to think about why. I didn't want to think about what. I didn't want to expect anything. And I feel so much lighter.
So, thanks for taking the effort again.
And I'm thankful for you. Always being there. Some things happen for a reason. I'm not going to listen or let what anyone say influence whatever impression I have on you. :)
Now,I don't know what I wanna talk about but I wanna talk to you. Baah.
Cutting and pasting resources. I'm not in the mood for 3rd assessment. I don't wish to feel demoralised. I guess that's the reason why I'm doing last minute prep works.
Oh well~
After Monday, I'm gonna party everyday after work.
Ok, probably not everyday. :D
No goodnights, just mornings!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Not really counting down but still kinda counting down.
Heh.
Only few more weeks left. 3?
Hee.
Excluding this week, 13 days?
I've been taking everything in stride but just don't make me feel so useless. I know I'm just an intern, learning, but you don't have to give it to me in my face. I've had enough trying to subconsciously reason out the way you behave, coming anytime to work, always rushing here and there, not even doing your job properly,forgetting every single detail. But you still think you're all that so who am I to comment. I'll just maintain a cold working relationship. No point getting chummy here.
You just spoiled my good day.
Anywayssssssss, it doesn't really affect me that much since you're pretty insignificant. :)
Have yet to do preps for third assessment. Not looking forward to it but I want to get it over and done with. Hopefully now, me and the children have a closer bond, if not, better than previously. Starting to love all the "I love you Teacher Narah" I get everyday. And the "throw my arms and fling my body towards you" kinda hugs. You know, those kinda hugs? :)
But I don't really appreciate the coughing in the face. I'm sick already. Baah.
Goodnight again.
:)
Only few more weeks left. 3?
Hee.
Excluding this week, 13 days?
I've been taking everything in stride but just don't make me feel so useless. I know I'm just an intern, learning, but you don't have to give it to me in my face. I've had enough trying to subconsciously reason out the way you behave, coming anytime to work, always rushing here and there, not even doing your job properly,forgetting every single detail. But you still think you're all that so who am I to comment. I'll just maintain a cold working relationship. No point getting chummy here.
You just spoiled my good day.
Anywayssssssss, it doesn't really affect me that much since you're pretty insignificant. :)
Have yet to do preps for third assessment. Not looking forward to it but I want to get it over and done with. Hopefully now, me and the children have a closer bond, if not, better than previously. Starting to love all the "I love you Teacher Narah" I get everyday. And the "throw my arms and fling my body towards you" kinda hugs. You know, those kinda hugs? :)
But I don't really appreciate the coughing in the face. I'm sick already. Baah.
Goodnight again.
:)
Saturday, February 5, 2011
You are the perfect distraction~
I should be starting on my resources.
But I haven't. Heh.
Maybe if I can't sleep tonight, it'll be spent wisely.
Gotta start on the preparation of juices tmr. Hope everything goes well on Tuesday :)
Somehow I haven't really felt nervous or scared for the second assessment. Maybe because I've yet to really sit down and think. Haha.Reflective journal is also due. Baah. Where the CNY holidays go to? Fuckity fuck.
Oh by the way, your facebook contacts must really appreciate your updates yea. Go ahead, noone's stopping you from that.
It definitely will not be me.
But I haven't. Heh.
Maybe if I can't sleep tonight, it'll be spent wisely.
Gotta start on the preparation of juices tmr. Hope everything goes well on Tuesday :)
Somehow I haven't really felt nervous or scared for the second assessment. Maybe because I've yet to really sit down and think. Haha.Reflective journal is also due. Baah. Where the CNY holidays go to? Fuckity fuck.
Oh by the way, your facebook contacts must really appreciate your updates yea. Go ahead, noone's stopping you from that.
It definitely will not be me.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Get your freakum dress on.
Cause when he acts up, that's when you put it on~
I wonder.
Let's just enjoy my weekend without any more wonderings :D
My mind's tired of wondering and wandering.
There is a difference right.
Goodnight.
I wonder.
Let's just enjoy my weekend without any more wonderings :D
My mind's tired of wondering and wandering.
There is a difference right.
Goodnight.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Rough lover
Supposed to be doing up resources now. I guess I'm still in holiday mood. Heck,I should be in holidays mood. It is the freaking holidays right. Right.
Watching some ghost movie with mommy now and I feel like having ice cream. I haven't been watching whatever I'm eating this past few days. And in this week,I've eaten meals at three fast food restaurants, Mac, KFC and Burger King,all of it within a span of days. And many2 hershey sundae pies. haha.
And everyone who knows are all cursing me saying I'll grow fat like a burger.
BAH. -_-
I've got too much alone time on my hands and during these times, I wonder a lot. I think a lot. I analyse situations a lot. I rationalise my own theories for certain situations. And sometimes, I don't like the outcomes of certain rationalisations that I think of.
What was I thinking when I made that decision? I'm wondering about that. Is it because I was just looking at the pros of the situation? So am I just supposed to just take the cons of the situations with a pinch of salt? Nothing is perfect right? If time will tell, then how long do I have to wait till I see something? I hate the silent moments. At the same time, I don't want to be thinking too much when its not needed.
I'm just confused now. Maybe I should just let it go and take it as it is. One day at a time.
Goodnight.
Watching some ghost movie with mommy now and I feel like having ice cream. I haven't been watching whatever I'm eating this past few days. And in this week,I've eaten meals at three fast food restaurants, Mac, KFC and Burger King,all of it within a span of days. And many2 hershey sundae pies. haha.
And everyone who knows are all cursing me saying I'll grow fat like a burger.
BAH. -_-
I've got too much alone time on my hands and during these times, I wonder a lot. I think a lot. I analyse situations a lot. I rationalise my own theories for certain situations. And sometimes, I don't like the outcomes of certain rationalisations that I think of.
What was I thinking when I made that decision? I'm wondering about that. Is it because I was just looking at the pros of the situation? So am I just supposed to just take the cons of the situations with a pinch of salt? Nothing is perfect right? If time will tell, then how long do I have to wait till I see something? I hate the silent moments. At the same time, I don't want to be thinking too much when its not needed.
I'm just confused now. Maybe I should just let it go and take it as it is. One day at a time.
Goodnight.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
I wish I could slap RESPECT on your cheeks.
I'm so angry, I can cry.
Whatever fuck is going on here, I really don't understand.
This is a blog entry I would really want these people to read. They'll hate me for it, but at least start thinking for once. Hopefully.
Actions and words can really hurt someone. Especially older people. Not just any random older people outside, I'm not referring to the uncle who stays at your block nor am I referring to your teacher. I'm not referring to the aunty who works at the same place you do nor am I referring to that particular makcik you see everyday. This is much more than that. Actually, however you act, whatever you say, it is all based on your parent's upbringing. You claim you love your parents? Then why act in such a disgusting and disrespectful way that can only reflect badly on your own parents? If you think you have your parent's support in whatever immature way you behave then congrats, your whole family will be applauded for being so united and rude to everyone else.
I really don't understand.
RESPECT.
For someone like you who is practically a nobody in the society now, you sure as hell demand a truck load of respect from other people, older or younger than you. I can only think of one reason why you expect people to respect you. Because you think you're a successful individual who has everything in her life.
Define "has everything" in the society today. My opinion of that would be,
Certs.
A successful and secure career.
A stable income.
This is just the needs. I'm not getting into the relationship parts because we all know that. So which one of that do you have again? Can you try showing anyone of us?
Or are you just a temp staff at some retail store earning money that is enough for your silly shoppings and serving your boyfriends.
And to the older ones who have grown so big in their heads to even show the most simplest form of respect to elders. Oh yea, you boys are way older than I am but the way you carry yourself? The way you behave towards people older than you? Even the 4 year old boy has enough sense to go and salam any uncle or aunty he sees. But, I guess your uncle and aunties are some evil monsters that you have to avoid because of immature conflicts that has got nothing to do with you yet you choose to be involved in it. And because of that, you don't feel the need to waste your precious time to even acknowledge elders who are there. So your actions and rude ways are supposed to be deemed as justifiable to other people? Cheers to how much you have grown physically and mentally after your puberty. In other words, cheers to the maturity of your mind yea?
Sad to say, human beings talk. They always do. They observe other human beings and they talk. They talk about anything, positive and negative. However you carry yourself in this world, people will talk. You're supposed to think of this yourself, but if people around you has always been saying you're in the right and others are in the wrong, then I'm sorry for you. You will never learn. I don't like how some of the elderly I know think and behave, but that doesn't give me the excuse to ignore their presence and not even acknowledge them. Alhamdullilah, I have wonderful parents who taught me that.
However you detest someone who is related to you, respect should always be there. Especially towards the elders. Seriously. If you start thinking about it, nothing negative that goes on between the elders realy affects the younger generation, you just choose to follow your reckless emotions and think that you're being mature and supportive towards your side by acting like an idiot.
But if you live in your own immature world where you're right and everyone else who isn't on your side is wrong, then try staying happy and prospering in life that way. Let's see how far all of you can go by making elders sad and disappointed by the way you treat them.
Whatever fuck is going on here, I really don't understand.
This is a blog entry I would really want these people to read. They'll hate me for it, but at least start thinking for once. Hopefully.
Actions and words can really hurt someone. Especially older people. Not just any random older people outside, I'm not referring to the uncle who stays at your block nor am I referring to your teacher. I'm not referring to the aunty who works at the same place you do nor am I referring to that particular makcik you see everyday. This is much more than that. Actually, however you act, whatever you say, it is all based on your parent's upbringing. You claim you love your parents? Then why act in such a disgusting and disrespectful way that can only reflect badly on your own parents? If you think you have your parent's support in whatever immature way you behave then congrats, your whole family will be applauded for being so united and rude to everyone else.
I really don't understand.
RESPECT.
For someone like you who is practically a nobody in the society now, you sure as hell demand a truck load of respect from other people, older or younger than you. I can only think of one reason why you expect people to respect you. Because you think you're a successful individual who has everything in her life.
Define "has everything" in the society today. My opinion of that would be,
Certs.
A successful and secure career.
A stable income.
This is just the needs. I'm not getting into the relationship parts because we all know that. So which one of that do you have again? Can you try showing anyone of us?
Or are you just a temp staff at some retail store earning money that is enough for your silly shoppings and serving your boyfriends.
And to the older ones who have grown so big in their heads to even show the most simplest form of respect to elders. Oh yea, you boys are way older than I am but the way you carry yourself? The way you behave towards people older than you? Even the 4 year old boy has enough sense to go and salam any uncle or aunty he sees. But, I guess your uncle and aunties are some evil monsters that you have to avoid because of immature conflicts that has got nothing to do with you yet you choose to be involved in it. And because of that, you don't feel the need to waste your precious time to even acknowledge elders who are there. So your actions and rude ways are supposed to be deemed as justifiable to other people? Cheers to how much you have grown physically and mentally after your puberty. In other words, cheers to the maturity of your mind yea?
Sad to say, human beings talk. They always do. They observe other human beings and they talk. They talk about anything, positive and negative. However you carry yourself in this world, people will talk. You're supposed to think of this yourself, but if people around you has always been saying you're in the right and others are in the wrong, then I'm sorry for you. You will never learn. I don't like how some of the elderly I know think and behave, but that doesn't give me the excuse to ignore their presence and not even acknowledge them. Alhamdullilah, I have wonderful parents who taught me that.
However you detest someone who is related to you, respect should always be there. Especially towards the elders. Seriously. If you start thinking about it, nothing negative that goes on between the elders realy affects the younger generation, you just choose to follow your reckless emotions and think that you're being mature and supportive towards your side by acting like an idiot.
But if you live in your own immature world where you're right and everyone else who isn't on your side is wrong, then try staying happy and prospering in life that way. Let's see how far all of you can go by making elders sad and disappointed by the way you treat them.